Dear Sam
by DaniRae92
Summary: This is more of a mystery type of one shot. In a since. It's a broken hearted love letter to Sam from an ex. You wont know who it is until the end. Enjoy.


_I saw this in the trash in the gym one day. I saw Sam's name and was immediately intrigued. Who would have written a love note to him. But as soon as I started reading it… I knew who it was and why they wrote it. Some love is just too much to handle, huh?_

_-Quinn Fabray._

**I wrote his name over and over again…**

**Sam Evans. Sam Evans. Sam Evans.**

**I couldn't stop writing it. I couldn't stop thinking about it. I couldn't stop dreaming about it. Sam and I….. Our first time. Everything that happened while we were together and what tore us apart..**

**You might think this is some cheesy diary or something, but it's not. It's more than that. It's my way of letting go of a good thing.**

**What was it about him that I adored so much…? The way his bangs were always in his face? His constant eye contact when he was talking to you? The way he laughed and showed off his gorgeous abs? Le sigh. It's almost as if I was in love with him since the moment we met.**

**Well, the rest of this is a letter I'll never send to him. My last few thoughts about our relationship that he'll never read. The things I need to get off my chest before I finally let this go and move on with my life. So here it goes….**

**Dear Sam,**

**Remember how we met? Right after the first winning football game that the team had since Bieste started and you transferred. I was immediately drawn to you and away from the first guy I thought I was falling in love with. I could tell he didn't want me anyway, so I just let it go. Because, when I saw you… Something in me told me that I needed to let you know. That.. I needed to let everyone know who I am. I'm not the coolest person around, and I'm definitely not the stupidest.. But I am the one that's most in love with you.**

**Boy… That night, when we met, is still as fresh in my head as it was the morning after. You greeted me with the precious smile that you have, the huge, ear-to-ear smile that always takes my breath away, especially then. I shook your hand and told you that you had a pretty great grip. You laughed and said that I did, too. Me? No way. I'd never be as strong as you. Well, obviously not emotionally..**

**Anyway, after we made our introductions, you told me about yourself. Why you moved here, what you'll miss… Everything. It was like I already knew it all because, as you told the story, I felt like I had been there watching you from above. An out of body experience? I don't think so, you'd have to be involved with what's going on to know about it, right? But, I was there. It all felt like old memories to me. It was the weirdest, and the coolest thing to happen to me.**

**Is that what started it? Our connection? I may not have the answer, but all I know is that the next time we hung out, you told me all about all the "other ones". I refer to all your exes as the "other ones" because… I never thought I'd be one of them. But, look at me now: sitting here, at my desk in class, writing this long letter to you. Maybe I'll give it to you, maybe I wont. I'll decide when it's finished. I probably will start crying when I finally finish it. I'm a sissy like that, but I never let anyone see it. That's a story for another time, though.**

**What was I saying? Oh yeah, the "other ones". You talked about this chick you dated before. I can't remember her name, but she sounded pretty awesome. And, I'll admit, she sounded hot. But, you said that it was you're first real heart break. My heart nearly shattered when you said that. I never wanted to picture you crying, and that was the first time I did. I wish it had been the last time I had anything to do with hearing about or seeing you crying…**

**After a while of hanging with you, I started to notice you and Quinn spending more and more time together. Pretty soon, you and her were a thing and I was left alone. You hardly talked to me, you sometimes ignored me, we even got into a fight once, remember? But, that was my fault. I was doing stupid stuff because I was mad, jealous, an asshole, and all those other words I know you were thinking. Everything was a mess, and I apologize for that.**

**One day, I saw you and her kiss. I saw the passion that happened, the heat in that moment. It was so relevant, it was tangible. My heart shattered when I saw that you were obviously going to be with her for a long time. Little did I know, that two months later she would end it between you both for someone else, even if he was in a wheelchair.**

**That was the first time I held you while you cried. That was the night we first kissed.**

**You came to my house and told me what happened. Quinn came to you and confessed that she had been falling for Artie and she couldn't be with you any longer because it was tearing her apart. You understood, even though you were heart broken. I, on the other hand, wanted to slap the bitch. But, that's just me… I'm not allowed to get into any more fights at school, surprise, surprise: I hate being on a contract. Plus, my parents would have murdered me for hitting someone. So, I just held you while you cried. It wasn't long before I got you laughing again. Since we'd been friends, I knew all to well how to make you smile. It was a talent I loved.**

**There we were, chilling out and laughing about stupid stuff we've done when our parents weren't home. When I said that I'd never actually disobeyed their rules, you laughed so hard I thought you would pee your pants. You thought it was so ridiculous. When you stopped and asked why I didn't laugh, all I did was kiss you. That was my answer. I was over come with emotions and that was all I thought about doing.**

**You didn't fight back, you didn't act shocked, at first you didn't even do anything. But, that was for a split second. Until you wrapped your arms around me and returned the kiss, kissing me back passionately. When you kissed me, I could tell I was in love. I could tell you felt the same and that we were going to end up together. I could finally put back the pieces of my shattered heart. When you kissed me, I was home again.**

**Do you remember that night? It wasn't only our first kiss… It was also our first time. The first time we made love. The way you kissed my skin gave me goose bumps. Your lips were soft and gentle as they explored my body. I had chills. It was the most amazing night I'd ever had. I'd never felt so close to someone. You brought the best out of me and I couldn't put any of the feelings I had into words. I still can't.**

**I remember you repeating my name, over and over. The sound of your voice rolling over your lips and into the room was intensely sexy. Sometimes when you say my name, I still get chills.**

**For a few months after that, we grew closer and closer. We began dating on November 27th****, 2009. I can clearly remember how you asked me. You took me to the auditorium and sang me a song: When You're Gone by Avril Lavigne. Not exactly a manly song, but you belted your heart out, for me. I cried. I had so many emotions… I was just so happy. You actually had the courage to say it out loud.**

**Two months passed with everything going great until Santana started hitting on you… As soon as that happened, I knew I had lost you. You were becoming disconnected, you wanted her more and more. You would hang out with her almost every weekend. When we weren't together, I knew you were with her, or talking to her. It broke my heart slowly. I started to think you were cheating, and maybe I was right, but I never asked. Until I got that note to meet you… "After school, Breadstix."**

**I dared myself not to go. I told myself that if I didn't it wouldn't happen. We'd work through it. But, I went anyway. I went and you told me that you had fallen for Santana. You secretly adored the jokes she made about your mouth. The way she'd boost you up and then knock you down, even if it seemed pretty maddening. I didn't even let you finish saying those fatal words. I just left before I could break down. I ran. I didn't know where I was going, but I ran. I didn't look back, I didn't even pay attention to where I was. I was crying too much to see, anyway.**

**February 3****rd****, 2010. The day Sam Evans broke my heart. The day I decided to grow up and stop taking shit from all the losers in the school. The day I moved on.**

**Today, March 16****th****, 2010, I write this letter. I've planned not to give it to you, but I know it'll be a huge step for me. I'll be able to get all my feelings out and not cross your path again. You've been with her for almost a month now. I should've known.**

**Finally, this is it. I feel myself already moving on. First Kurt rejected me, which was a baby step compared to this. Now you have let me down. That's why I'm such a huge asshole to everyone. Oh, well. They'll get used to it.**

_**Signed,**_

_**David Karofsky**_


End file.
